So the pressure to perform and to produce follows me throughout my life. Especially in being a Christian. I seriously thought about titling my blog "Parenting is Death.com" just to see what sort of reaction I would get. It definitely, more accurately describes how I feel on a regular basis. Of course, by "death" I mean death to all things that pertain to my selfish nature. Parenting has taught me just how truly selfish I am. And that, my friends, is no picnic. No walk in the park. Of course, what I get in return for dying, is Life. Jesus said,
Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self.--Matthew 16:25 (Msg)
It's so true. What I get, when I trade in my selfishness, or as Oswald Chambers said it best, my claim to my right to myself, is selflessness. When I trade in my impatience, I get patience in return. For my anger, I get God's peace. My pride, His humility. It's a rather raw deal on His end, if you ask me.
So instead of performing, life, real life, is about dying. Less of me, more of Him. In dying, we live. In laying down our lives, we find that same resurrection life and power that raised Christ from the dead. It is then, and only then, that we truly find ourselves.